Trying not to let disappointment trip me up.

I am trying not to be disappointed in myself. I have fallen off the wagon as far as the gung ho motivation. I am going to kick my own butt this week and I am not going to allow myself to get lazy. I can understand that this last week I was hormonal and had a lot of money stress, but what I need to realize is when I am feeling like that it is the MOST important to me to take care of myself. Because not doing so just makes it all worse.

Today I have already walked my 30 minutes, and I have done my streches and 50 crunches. I’ve showered, dressed, applied makeup, etc., and gotten my toddler cleaned up, dressed, etc. as well. My husband was gracious enough to load the dishwasher for me while I was out walking, so now I only have a few more dishes to put in there (yes, they were THAT piled up), and I’m going to get all my housework caught up. We seriously need to get some laundry done so that is another thing I need to focus on today. I have a couple more household management type things to do as well.

As far as my own personal needs, I just need to make sure I eat within my calorie range, drink my water, and get a couple of veggies and fruits in there somewhere. I need to decide what vitamin supplements I want to take to make sure I’m getting all the nutrients I need. I am also going to need to get some glucosamine condroitin to help with my joint pain.

I went to the doctor on Friday, to talk about my body pain, to find out if maybe I was doing something wrong that was exacerbating the pain I am having. Basically it was a wasted trip, in that she had nothing to offer as far as my fibro flares go. She told me to keep exercising, but maybe to step back the intensity. The only surprising thing that happened, that redeemed the whole trip to the doctor was that she took a look at my walking shoes and deemed them “horrible”, and that I need to get a much better shoe and arch support. I am not surprised that she said “horrible”, they are WalMart specials with velcro instead of shoestrings. So I guess I need to invest in a good pair of shoes in the very near future. I’m sure that will help with the arches hurting. I noticed today that I didn’t have any shin pain walking at a slightly slower pace, but was really distracted by the arch pain. My achilles tendons are still sore but I am trying to keep them nice and stretched. I am taking advil a couple times a day as I can remember to help with the inflammation.

I haven’t been too good with the soda war. I have been indulging in it every day almost, and I am ready to get back into the 6 days off 1 day on routine. My hubby bought some pop and is going to keep it locked up so that I can only get to it with his consent. I really love having the caffeine boost but the calories are truly empty calories and I don’t have many to spare. I just miss it so much. I don’t like coffee or tea so I’m pretty screwed there. It’s water for me, and it can get pretty boring. I am not into those flavor things you put in the water. If I can’t have my pleasing confection of bubbles and cola, then I would rather just drink the water. It is a sad affliction to me.

Our money situation is causing me a lot of stress. This stress is adversely affecting so many things and it is really giving me a hard time in focusing on my health goals. I have not learned how to let go of the stress in regard to the money. I will spend some time balancing my checkbook and figuring out what the next paycheck is going to look like, and once I realize I have done everything I can possibly do, that is simply going to have to do. I just don’t know how to let go of the worry. It sucks so many units of happiness out of me, I cannot even begin to explain to you.

Well, I can’t stop the momentum, I need to get going on the tasks I have set for myself. Au revoir.

Today’s Inspirational Muse Brought To You by:

Shattered Dreams – Johnny Hates Jazz
So Alive – Love and Rockets
Rock the Casbah – The Clash
Try Again – Aaliyah
I Don’t Wanna Go On With You Like That – Elton John
No More “I Love Yous” – Annie Lennox
I’ve Been Thinking About You – Londonbeat

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