Evil Stepmother

Current mood: irritated

Please be advised that I have officially had to pull out the “evil stepmother” side of myself today.  Every time Princess comes home from certain friends’ houses, she acts like a pure shit.

So I had to lay the smack down.  She’s hiding in the basement because she KNOWS better than to come around me right now!!!

I am sick and tired of kids being soooo used to getting every fucking thing they want and THEN expecting MORE or not APPRECIATING what they have. 

Just a little insight into what happened – I *told* her last week that I did not want her leaving her electronic toys, art supplies, or anything laying around in the living room, that I couldn’t be responsible if anything happened to them.  Plus, they were clutter, and I’m trying to eliminate clutter.  I’m sick of having to gather up bits and pieces of her Nintendo and other devices, and prying them out of Lola’s hands.  I’m tired of Lola wanting to play with her stuff and being brokenhearted because she’s not allowed to.  I have told her several times to stop doing this.  So, she left her DS laying on the TV with all her games, when she left to go to this friends’ house, rather than taking it up to her room right then.  So, Daddy took it and put it away.  I don’t even know where it IS!  So after she realized it was gone and went looking all over for it, I asked her if she remembered what I had asked her to do, last week.  And did she remember laying her DS on top of my TV with all the games?  Well, Daddy decided to confiscate — you will have to talk to him to get it back.  She starts her pouty crap — I called Daddy to find out if he would be home on time and be available to talk to Princess about the DS.  He said yes.  But she would have to wait.  So she got mad and went downstairs.  I heard things being thrown, I walked down and caught her in the act of her tantrum.  I informed her that she probably would have gotten her DS back today, but since she is acting like a shit, she probably will not. 

I also reminded her that it was HER laziness and not living up to our signed contract that has lost her the laptop for the past month.  HER laziness that caused the DS to be put away.  I also told her that if she didn’t stop acting disrespectful and unappreciative of what she DOES have, then I would put a stop to her going over to certain friends’ and relatives’ homes, because she always acts worse when she hangs out with them.  Like she thinks she can pull the same stuff here. 

I reminded her that the laptop and the DS weren’t the only high-priced electronic devices we have bought for her recently, and she’s sitting down there pouting like she has NOTHING to do.  She has a TV, VCR, DVD player, CD player, a damned IPod, several books she wanted at Christmas that costed $20 each that I haven’t seen her crack open since she got them. 

Earlier today, when she was getting dressed for the day, Lola wanted to go upstairs to be with her, because she was just so happy to see her sissy since she’d been gone for 2 1/2 days.  She went into Princess’s room, and was getting out BEANIE BABIES and Princess was having a fit, not wanting her to TOUCH them.  They are $6 Beanies, none of which are collectible because they have been abused and used as toys by her. 

I don’t let Lola touch any of her expensive toys, but I DO expect her to be somewhat flexible on stuffies or whatever.  Especially since we share all of our things with her.  I bend over backwards to do everything nice I can do for her.  If Lola had a really cute stuffed animal or other thing, and she HAS had a few that Princess was interested in, I would not tell her no if she wanted to look at them, hold them, or whatever.  And especially since those stuffed animals that Lola wanted to look at aren’t her favorites, she hardly ever looks at them.  She is just being selfish.  And even if she is worried that Lola would harm them, I was right there and wouldn’t have let anything like that happen.  Lola is only 22 months old, she’s just starting to understand “No” and “Mine”, I don’t want her learning to be selfish, I want her to see generosity and mimic THAT.

Anyway, I’m not putting up with pouty, unappreciative bullshit. 

I mean, today, all I asked her to do was hang out with her sister, rather than doing any of the hard cleaning housework I’ve been doing.  But I just let her lay on the couch and watch TV with her sister.  Not even really babysitting because I’m right here.

Bratty behavior stops NOW. Or else someone is going to be in a bad way.


Skin Issues

Current mood: contemplative

OK, this entry deals withsome of the issues I’m having with my appearance. I started out with a list of my assets:

My bosom (quite nice, when encased in a supportive garment), my eyes (as long as they don’t have shadows), my feet (post-pedicure), my hands, my figure (proportionate, hourglass shape regardless of size).

My liabilities – my teeth (need whitening and some dental work), my tummy (post c-section, the scar is HORRIBLE, and my muscle tone atrocious), and the most upsetting and long-term is my skin. My facial skin mainly, and this has caused me much trouble since my early teens. I’m prone to acne, not just whiteheads or blackheads, but huge, painful cystic acne. This is totally hormonal. Every cyst that I have causes a pitting scar, regardless of how it is handled. So now, after all these years, I have pitted, discolored sagging skin and have NO idea how to address it. What I can do to fix things. I am interested in getting some skin treatments either from a dermatologist or esthetician but I have no idea where to go or what I should have done. I am unhappy with the way my skin looks with or without makeup. Makeup does not cover my problems at all. In fact, sometimes I feel makeup makes it more visible. I just want my skin to be smooth and healthy looking. It doesn’t have to be perfect, alabaster, model’s type skin, but my skin looks like a gravel road right now!!!

Here are some pictures I took today to show you what I mean. If you know anything about this subject and want to give me some ideas or suggestions, I would appreciate it.

This shot is somewhat blurred but you can STILL see the unevenness of the skin and the pitting.

Pitting in the cheekbone/temple area, this is some of the most visible.

See what I mean about the pitting? It’s discolored too, but that’s not as visible because I have foundation on.

A close up around my mouth. The pitting is bad in some spots on both sides of the mouth because of huge cysts I tend to get there, accumulatively causing me to have some big pits.

A face shot, you can see the uneven texture of my skin and this is my “I don’t feel pretty” face.

Don’t get me wrong, my mood is still excellent. I’m just thinking it’s time to take better care of me, and this is something that makes me sad so I want to see if I can remedy it after all these years. My skin problems began at age 13. I’m 33 now. 20 years of unhappiness is enough. Don’t you think?

OK, just so I don’t end this post on a negative note, here is a picture of our kitten Blaze. Three things to know. 1) Blaze is only 6 months old. 2) The shoe next to him is to give you a scale of his size — that’s a man’s size 10 1/2. 3) There are two 12-inch rulers next to him to show you that he is over 2 feet long WITHOUT stretching out.

Isn’t he a huge adorable tom cat? What will he be like when he is fully grown?


Currently listening :
Reading, Writing and Arithmetic
By The Sundays
Release date: By 04 April, 1990